brighter than sunshine

all we have to do is keep breathing

2007-11-06T22:31:00.000+08:00

hello. 2 more days to the end of forward track, and i cant bloody wait. most probably, i'll be spending saturday with my cousins, insya allah. if not, i guess i'll just entertain myself at home watching videos :)

anyhoos, the last few days was definitely tiring, and boring. i mean, IT'S FORWARD TRACK WEEK LAH DEH. dont even get the point of forward track since most of us arent even paying attention. so what do we do in class? TRY to pay attention, sleep OR eat frosties. HAHAAHAHA.

just now, spent after school time with musetant. went to sengkang to get her jeans. so far mcm fhfbsfbskdshgbks. but luckily i got a straight bus to woodlands int, 161, so i just slept all the way :D

even if it doesnt involve me, i want you, need you, to be happy. cos time changes and our lives rearrange, but knowing you're doing well makes it all alright, i think?

dammit i cant blog properly anymore :O

somewhere along the way, i think i lost you.

packed your bags and walked away

2007-10-29T23:08:00.000+08:00

augustus babies
case self timer

ni biler nabuylah nk masok frame tros jatuh. HAHAHA

archerlinnnn

sorry for being MIA, but i cant help it. so basically, the whole gang went jalan raye, like finally. and i have to say that shairah's cousin, or something like that, was super bloody cute and chubbyyyyy. yay :D

cuckoo sia jojo

needless to say, we'll be starting out holiday a little bit later than the rest, cos we have forward track yay! -______- and theeeeeen theres malay ppr on wed. omgzxzhsjbhfjbdsfs. im not exactly that ready lah haiyoooooooo. tapi tkpe. insya allah boleh dapat distinction, klau tk maimoon akan jitak kiter sumer.

i'll give a better update soon :)

2007-10-15T15:04:00.000+08:00

this year's hari raya was full of... laughter and slightly different than before. i had lots of fun hanging out with the cousins. and the food was good. and the kuih too :)

so girls, ljs or kfc? HAH!

from the ballroom floor, we are a celebration

2007-10-11T19:53:00.000+08:00

okay its thursday! another day to puase and then it'll be the long(more like short actually) awaited hari raya! omg :O

monday was spent with the physics people, and we went to liy's house right after the 30 min paper(wtf?) and guess what, we watched freaking barbies diaries. i personally liked that show and i watched it before but it's still fun to watch it again :) (im a kid at heart lah.) so yes, we played monopoly! yes, that game that's very draggy and all, and i was the banker! :) but heck, in the end liy was the big winner. hahaha!

tuesday, we went out to buke at our fav. (really ar?) restaurant at far east. it was more of a birthday gift shopping trip and trust me, we circled the whole far east and i bought earrings for hari raye! (even though i dont really see the point as you all know my hair will be covering my ears anyway but heck, it has always been a tradition to wear earrings lah, for the sake of wearing). so after buke, we bought fried mars bars and made our way to heeren and went to hmv to listen to songs :) i like lifehouse's newest cd and mae's too :) seeing that by the time we finished listening to songs, it was already 9, we had a little camwhore session by the fountain before heading home.

AND THAT'S WHEN I SAWWWWW............ green guy version 2 :)
and only atiqtoq knows how excited i was, but he was really cute. HAHAHAHA
but too bad, there was a green woMAN blocking our view.
but i think it was really cute and a bit too funny when either atiqtoq or i will be looking at him and he ALWAYS manage to catch either of us looking. I THINK HE'S PSYCHIC LEH.

ok now that's that.

we went to the library today, and i saw mr. H look a like. a bit too scary cos i nearly knocked my head on the library door cos i was too busy staring at him and trying to figure out whether it was really mr. H, or the imposter wtf. but yeaaaaaah we borrowed good books in the library and just read there, before heading out and i bought my red hairband to match my baju raye :)

and for the past few days, i had to do LOTS of cleaning, cos since my bro is in camp, my father passed me the job of cleaning the house. but i have to say it is very satisfying to see the result after hours of cleaning up :) and my father was like, 'the ten dollars(for buke on tuesday) i gave you was worth it ah. good job.' HAH LIKE THAT ONLY HAH. tapi tkpe aku buat dgn ikhlas. HAHAHAHA.

okay i dont think i'll be able to post tmr, or saturday OR sunday for that matter. so slamat hari raye to all! maaf zahir batin :)

LETS BOUNCE.

it's so beautiful when the boy smiles

2007-10-06T15:34:00.000+08:00

the thursday when we didnt have to attend sch, cos we didnt have any paper duh, i visited my brother at the home academy, which is of cos at cck. so stupid cos i feel like im going to sch -__-. so anyway, i think my brother looks better in blue than green. he was from army then he got transferred to police, or something like that.

speaking of army, pictures from the passing out parade :)

and the pictures from 180807, fireworks day :D

ni kes da after fireworks tros muker penat. haha!

it's a lazy saturday! YAY. i was planning to catch up on my readings and maybe decorate my board, clean my room, make a new template and theeeeeeen have a movie marathon, or maybe i should just be a couch potato and rot in front of the tv, now that would be fun :)

i couldnt sleep last night. actually aku tertido HAHAHA. and i missed my ghost whisperer. but i woke up at 12.15 and placed myself in front of the tv and watched old cartoon shows while reading a book. and then i started to write random stuff till 4.15 before finally heading off to bed. AND I WOKE UP LATE FOR MADR (actually the only reason i woke up was cos i had a really weird dream. k atiqs nanti aku blang kau biler in the mrt HAHAHA)

i dont really know why, but i cant wait for monday. i miss everyone, and i cant wait to see atiq's metals, even though its half ready. and after monday, it'll be two days of holidays and then sch and then hari raya! i cant wait for this year's hari raya. i mean, it's one of those times where you can really spend time with the cousins.

i suddenly like october, especially the first week of october :) although it has its downs, but the ups are super good, if you know what i mean.

laughing lover and i :)

Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.

let's try to remember

2007-10-04T01:05:00.000+08:00

it is safe to say, that the major papers are over, and theres only cme left. so technically, EOYs over!

this week, we've spent a whole lot of time in the library, revising, laughing and people watching. the thrill of seeing your old crush never gets old, especially when he happens to be just a few feet away from where you were sitting :) yes, i saw my mr. H, twice :D and then theres always the companion of muttons on the radio, and sending random dedications and laughing about in on the phone. and then theres the constant stress that we feel while we're studying together, but seeing those adorable cute ones actually gave us motivation, sometimes even hope.

and then, theres G.G. in my quest to find that one person, ive met others, who definitely didnt have any resemblance whatsoever to my G.G.

today, the highlight of the day was probably being shouted at/accused of going to lot 1 to eat, by a very random, very green stranger, but definitely not my G.G. apparently, i was too shocked and lost for words so i couldnt even think of defending myself, cos in the first place, i thought he wasn talking to me -____- but apparently he was. apparently he thinks im deaf or something, cos he shouted the accusation loudly.

and there i was, thinking he was crazy and has probably gone a bit cuckoo :O

so now, since i have all the time in the world, im going to indulge myself in my little projects. heee :) and a little shopping trip wont hurt.

the fact is, everybody's changing, and we're so close, yet so far. all the things we had seemed to disappear, just like that. everyone has their own things going on now. what happened to us? why cant we sit together for one day and talk about everything and anything? why is it so hard to spend time with each other. why is it awkward to even be in the same room with each other, knowing that theres lesser, and lesser things that we have in common.

truth is, we have the whole world to talk about. and i miss you, all of you. despite everything that has happened this year, despite the drama, the fights, i still love you, all of you.

i love all of you for being there with me through it all, for catching me when i fall, for motivating me to give my best and for the fun and laughter you've brought into my world.

im sorry, for us.

it's heavy and it hurts and it's love

2007-09-28T21:48:00.000+08:00

i hope he has a really nice name to go along with his really nice looking face.
HAHA.
im sorry but he's dfnsdfhsnfofnsjfbsdjfbs. and i got dfhsjdfnsdfsobdfsdfsufib when he caught me looking.

and that green stranger made my day :)
for all it was worth, today started out badly. woke up late, but managed to get to sch in time -_-
after sch, had amaths tuition, had the shock of my life when someone called about my mp3.
i nearly died (trying to be dramatic here).
but NO. everything turned out okay :)

so let's see, 7 more papers to go. good luck to all :)
and i'll be back, after the exams. more specifically, after my physics & hist paper.

OMG HARI RAYA COMING LEH :O
aha k bye.

have a little faith

2007-09-15T03:04:00.000+08:00

dear life,

ive always hated the period before EOY. everything feels rushed and everywhere you go, there'll be people who will constantly remind you of the upcoming EOY and the fact that you should study REALLY hard, cos basically it's the last examination period for the year, yay!
so yes, 8 more days till EOY. im not sure whether thats enough time for me to actually revise everything perfectly, but im hoping for the best. bcos being negative doesnt really help when it comes to exams. you're basically demoralising yourself tsk.

i think all i could ever talk about right now is EOY. of cos im bloody scared of the upcoming exams. i mean, who doesnt want to do well? and really, im really trying my best to really REALLY concentrate on my studies, so to the people i havent been talking to for days now, im sorry. but it's not like im online much nowadays.

i dont really know whats going on anymore, but im just letting everything else go, everything that doesnt have anything to do with my studies & grades, for now at least. revisions are enough to wear me out.

so yes, thats basically my life. everything revolves around studies, at least for now. we'll see how it goes, wont we?

i'll update when i have the time.
for now, slamat berpuase! it's already the fasting month! :)
okay bye :D

2007-09-10T21:11:00.000+08:00

ok so yeah ive been pretty busy lately trying to catch up with schoolwork, cos EOYs are coming duh. even if i have the time to get my ass online, i just dont have the mood to, like right now. so anyway, ive just watched tarzan, yes that really old disney movie but i like it, for some reason. and it makes me wanna catch the lion king again -_-.

so anyway, first day of term 4. it was nothing much though. the same old routine all over again but this time, my attitude towards lessons is a wee bit better. i actually paid attention instead of sleeping :)

so yeah, maybe i wont be updating anytime soon, maybe i will. it totally depends on my mood and the availability of the computer, seeing that my bro is gonna be back. in fact, he's having his passing out parade tmr, and im attending it :)

so yes, 2 more weeks till EOY. study people :)

2007-09-07T01:05:00.000+08:00

i spent my thursday with dear nj. we headed down to nlb to have a little study date. apparently, we did more camwhoring than studying. but at least i did physics, and nj did chem and her geog notes, which were so colourful cos apparently she spent 20 bucks buying things thats obviously not important at popular -_____-. oh and she labelled everything in her pencil box wtf. but hell yeah i had fun playing with her markers and singing the lion king song to her haha. so anyway, we went to bugis street to buy our earrings, cos i lost one of hers, so we bought two whole new sets. and then apparently we got tired of bugis so headed to town and i had my lunch. to entertain ourselves, we played the would you rather game. and that got us laughing like hell over my burger king. and then proceded to hmv. okay so we wasted a lot of time there browsing through cds and listening to new albums. and i fell in love with yellowcard all over again :) and i totally like jacks mannequin's album cover. so yeah, and apparently the vcds hated us cos we kept dropping cds all over the place. haha :D

so theeeeen we finally went to esplanade. eventually, we got lost a little. and we did a lot of walking before meeting up with the bacins.

okay so im practically writing a whole post about thursday. but yeah it was a hell lot of fun lah kan. even though someone practically forbid me to go home -______-. but yeah thanks for accompanying me to the kedai minyak to buy new paper. WTF

im tired.
but im going out laterk also. how? -_-

2 more days till school, again. -___________-

2007-09-04T23:55:00.000+08:00

the exam fever has officially settled in. right now, im, like, petrified, cos apparently, i have a lot of things to cover for EOY exams. but no worries becos ive started on my revision hurray! so anyway, just now there was amaths & hist remedial. after that, mus, nabuylah, atiqs, herianti & i headed down to lot 1 to have breakfast(?!) and then we headed to the stadium. it was meant to be a jogging date but instead, musfie & nabuylah were the only ones who actually ran on the track. i was just wasting my time dancing with atiqtoq. after that, we decided to camwhore with my hp and then headed to the park just in front of kranji pri, and we took more pics yay :D

so anyway, i dont even know why im writing about today. just that i actually had fun, even spending 3 hours doing physics didnt seem to ruin my mood today.

EOY officially ends on the 3rd october for us physics people, and i just cant wait. after EOY, it's really the time to let loose and just celebrate cos we actually survived sec 3, with its drama and everything. i mean, who would have thought we would make the friends we have now, or grow as a person. i mean, sec 3 is waaaaay too unpredictable for me. it's quite a relief that im not that affected by all the drama that has been happening.

obviously this post has no motive, cos im rambling about nothing in particular. just wanted to blog, bcos i wanted to blog.

EOYEOYEOYEOYEOYEOYEOY.
okay bye.

psst. im making ic on friday!
HAH WTH -___-

so what's the craziest thing you've done lately?

2007-09-02T14:00:00.000+08:00

hello bacinsku sekalian. 31st august was, after all, teachers day. and i did have lots of fun, even without the existence of a school concert. but anyhoos, the food delight was good and we were well prepared. after food delight, hyuk-ers and us sec 3s played a game of captains ball on the field. there was a lot of rolling & screaming but it was all good fun & good exercise. after that, had a change of clothes cos mine was damn dirty as i fell a couple of times on the field. met up with safia at cck & then headed down to fuchun where i met up with the rest. so yeah walked around a bit then headed to ljs for lunch. hanged out with the boys after that at carpark & they were a riot lah wtf. played cards with them. and i lost my touch, cos it's been years since ive played cards. kinda miss the whole fuchun crew being together and trust me, they change. hoho.

but at the end of the day, i had a smile stuck to my face, but my nose is seriously irritating me.

okay we both look sepet here wtf -__-

so yeah spent my saturday with that boy. a lot of walking, i was smiling for no particular reason, bcos smiling is a good thing you see. so yeah went around town. watched them play pool. eh it's pretty fun to sit down & just observe, serious. and thennnn we headed down to esplanadee. damn he has very comical friends. and then went back home hoho :D but overall, i had fun :D

time check: 1.47 am
i suddenly lost the mood to blog. seriously, i wanted to write a million things just now but waiting for the pics to be uploaded just ruins the mood man. oh and before that, it's the september holidays! time to go out and have fun till late. but we can never forget the fact that EOYs are just around the corner so time to mug mcm tk tau ape also.

and it's definitely the right time for study dates, no? and beack outings, and ball games! i want to get more tanned :D

and i want to be back at the jetty where i can see the stars. i want to be back in ubin, where life is just there, no communication beyond that island and everyday is a new experience.

actually, i just want to be lying on an open field, star gazing.
pfft.

okay im tired.
this post mcm long, padehal.

AND HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY ODAHKU! aku sayang kau mcm tk tau ape :D!

2007-08-30T00:50:00.000+08:00

i didnt have the time or mood to update becos of the fact that from monday to wednesday, we were all being bombarded by common tests and panic attacks cos we all know it was just some last minute studying thing.

so today, to end common test, we had our lovely physics paper, which was out to kill me btw. so yeah after school, FINALLY went to lot 1 and hanged out with laughing lover, nabuylah & atiqtoq. it feels like it has been a million years since ive stepped into lot 1(padehal baru brape hari jer wtf). oh and my hp decided to dieeee so i was without a clock for the whole bus ride to hougang and back again pfft. -____-

so lets see, i know this is waaaay back, but on the 26th, i spent my time with my family & nazira(!!). and we had a blast walking around bugis and exchanging stories between each other. we proceded to marina centre and walked arund looking for nothing in particular but it was all in the name of good fun. starbucks, oreo cheesecake, icecream & good company = a happy birthday! :D

now that common test is finally over, i think it's time we should abandon our books and just get out of the house and have a nice trip to town together, or the beach for that matter. im in the mood for some serious bonding sessions cos i think ive been neglecting certain people.

and i think my eyes are getting smaller by the day, since my sleeping time has been disrupted by the presence of common test. -_________-

oh and grey's anatomy was on tv just now anddd i realised how much i miss watching that show when i have nothing better to do.

happy birthday to hazirah & amirah. both belated btw :)

i feel sleepy.

freaking fifteen :)

2007-08-26T23:27:00.000+08:00

26th august 2007 :)

AKU 15!

we'll feel so alive

2007-08-24T19:52:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 15TH BIRTHDAY BEST FRIENDKU NJ!

4 papers down. 5 more to go!

anyway, today marks nadia's 15th birthday! :D in the morning, atiqtoq and i were nearly late, actually not really. we THOUGHT we were late so we practically brisk-walked to school. turns out we didnt need to assemble so we went straight to class. hist & amaths were horrendous. ok so hist wasnt that bad but amaths was nfjdnfsjfsojfsfhjsbfsdkfs. i really REALLY tried but i just couldnt solve the questions -_-. so after sch, played around with the camera. nj, liy & i decided to celebrate nj's birthday by heading down to town. saw didi through the bus window and had a quick messaging session with him :D i miss that shorty :]

so anyway, the trip to town wasnt wasted. we bought a lot of junk food, which includes my favourite mrs fields cookie. managed to get atiqtoq's & nj's present :D actually the trip was more of a finding-presents kinda thing.

thanks dan, liy, nadi & nj for the shirt :D, even though i took so long to find it hehe :]
and liy happens to swoon in the mrt cos this particular person has a cute shy smile. and omg the socks HAHA.

i walked back home from the interchange today. it's kinda a good thing cos i was able to spend time just thinking. i miss those rounds at the stadium and the long talks about life with the girls. i know things have changed since then. and i guess time changes all of us. in a week, a lot of things changed and somehow, i just have to adapt to it. maybe friends come and go, maybe it's better to forget and ignore the obvious truth. maybe it's wiser to put your friends ahead of yourself. maybe, just maybe, im doing the right thing, whatever that means.

if ignorance is the best solution, then why not? yeah why not.
cos i miss the way im able to just talk crap with you and not care about what you think just because. we were supposed to be friends.. who ignores each other to a certain extent?
maybe that will work out.

i cant wait for the september holidays. i need the break to get myself on the right track and keep in touch with old friends :]

i feel weird. pfft.
2 more days! :)

everything comes with a price

2007-08-21T22:37:00.000+08:00

i am not definitely not ready for common test. apparently i have to do a mock exam given by my tuition teacher on amaths. and bloody hell i have no idea what the hell the question is asking pfft. -___-

today, i mostly slept in class. i have no idea why but i felt very sleepy and just spaced out during ss and chem. oh and my first papers happen to be eng & CHEMISTRY. wtf.

so anyway, just now, liy, nadi, nj & i made our way to bpp & hanged out at the garden plaza, talking about everything n anything. i kept eating & eating. i have no idea why but i just felt really hungry at that particular period of time. made my way to hougang at about 5 and fell into a deep sleep till the bus stop where i was supposed to alight at.

i know we both know that this thing is getting a tad too old. i can see through all your lies. obviously to you, this feels like a game. but honestly, even if this is a game, you're never gonna win darling. im not here for your entertainment. and maybe you should think when you picked us to be your victims. once again, your lies are of no use. apparently, you will never change. i feel so sorry for you. i feel sorry for those who has to stick by you cos i think most of us here just pity you. cos you dont get it. maybe you're too immature to realise that when it comes to emotions, it's never a game. it's funny how things can change by weeks. but i see the big picture now.

dont bother to call, i cant be bothered to care. i got other things in my mind, like exams hoho. and please, if you want entertainment, turn on the tv or something.

and besides, once i get a watch, i'll rarely use my hp on weekdays.

5 more days :)

a matter of time

2007-08-19T20:07:00.000+08:00

the people who made it all worthwhile, junko :D

my kayaking partner, who happens to be my lover's scandal hoho :]
my rock climbing buddy, clara. and that's exactly what happened to my shoe after obs. pftt -_-. & the jetty's perfect for star gazing & sleeping :D

this sounds weird and surprisingly strange but now that i think about it, i miss OBS, and everything that goes with it. i miss the pitching of tents after a tiring day of trekking/kayaking/rock climbing. i miss those nights when i'll be able to look up at the night sky and see the many stars up above accompanying the moon. i miss junko, obviously.

the trip to obs was seriously not what i expected it to be. it was pretty much very tiring. i wanted to drop dead after 9 hours of kayaking. the trekking was fun, with the greenery surrounding us.

i want it all back.

im thinking of abandoning my handphone for a week. i just cant be bothered to worry about my bill anymore. hoho

& yesterday, i realize more than everything else, that if you live in the present, you'll be likely to have more fun. the fireworks-watching with the girls was great. we were being crazy as usual but it was worth it, just hanging out with them and exchanging obs stories. i went back home later than i promised but it was worth it :D i guess you could say it's actually a good time to have a permentasan, although i slept towards the end of the first permentasan. tsk.

common test is coming up next week, along with birthdays :D. and after all this, there'll be the september holiday.

and time waits for no man. tsk -_-

photos from the fireworks will be posted later ogay :D

my instructor's famous(wtf) words, 'live in the present. dont worry about the future cos you'll never know when you're gonna die.' :DDD